it had to be you

I sit staring out of my study window

orange greens browns golds brown pine needles everywhere

no women to be seen

my lover of 4 years nearly 5

gone to follow fishwrap

that fishwrap, the cute little screamer

gone too

and the stoic spartan warrior woman

“I don’t know how to respond to you anymore” corporate junkie 80 hr week

slave to retirement

a daughter looking at NYU graduate studies

work you do. baby.

I think of the other one, the new one, a lot still.

golden aired surprise

I wonder

I wonder

I grit my teeth